Close to the top of the list of the most boring rides ever has to be Los Angeles to Laughlin. Especially the 144 miles along Interstate 40 from smelly Barstow to the scorched earth city of Needles. There are however freight trains to look at off in the distance.  But going 80+ miles per hour on a bike, the eyes can't wander too long.

Hey it's Laughlin, and you do what you have to do. 

At this year's River Run (the 37th consecutive year), everyone seemed to be talking about how much the attendance was down, why Harley Davidson didn't bother to show up, and rumors about the 2019 edition being the final year for the River Run.  The event has been promoted since 1993 by a California corporation called Dal Con Promotions. 

Rumor has it Dal Con has decided to pull out of Laughlin.  We did however see these flyers circulating over the weekend:

Dal Con Promotions' name does not appear on the flyer.  The Edgewater and Colorado Belle hotels are simply assuming there will be a 38th River Run happening in late April 2020 with or without Dal Con in charge. 

Reasons we heard over the weekend as to why attendance is down:

(1) Price gouging by the hotels.  A river view balcony room at the Colorado Belle normally goes for $119 a night on weekends.  This rate doubles during the River Run.  Here's a quote from a 2019 River Run participant:

It's simple price gouging $300 a night, 3 night minimum stay any other time the hotel rooms are $29 to $49. I can't remember the last time I saw big-name entertainment. Can't remember the last time I saw vendors that didn't get their prices doubled for their spaces.  The greedy people here in Arizona that drove most of the vendors away and won't pay for the big names to come in.  That's what killed the rally.

(2) Increased police presence.  For the Run, Las Vegas sends a small army of cops to keep the peace.  Mostly just annoying and clogging up South Casino Drive with their vehicles and horses.  Also sitting in front of hotels with their lights flashing for no apparent reason.  Here's a quote from another participant:

This year, the cops were in more force than I've ever seen.  My ol' lady works security at the Riverside casino and she told me the same thing. I've been going to this event for years and watched it go down hill in the last 4 years. The cops pull over people for no reason. They are bringing metro from Vegas now and are harassing people on foot. 
It's become so g rated you might as well be at Disney World.  

Although the flashing LED lights on the horses' tails were kind of cute. 

​(3) Complaints that The Run today is "less of everything." For example: fewer vendors, not enough bands/entertainment, clubs closing earlier, etc.  One thing we really missed this year was the outdoor stage on the patio behind the Colorado Belle.  The patio is right on the river walk and has a nice view to the east.  The music would start in the late afternoon and go until late in the evening.  This year an eerie silence replaced the festive atmosphere of past years.  The patio bands had been relocated to the large white tent out in the hotel parking lot, where the temperature on the asphalt was somewhere around Mars. 
​
You know what makes this Country great, you have the choice to do whatever you want to do. So either go or don’t go, it’s a CHOICE for one to have fun or NOT. So quit your fucking crying!!!   ​quote from 2019 River Run participant

I know a lot of us will always make the pilgrimage to Laughlin on the last weekend in April.  I don't know if riding for a very long time across the Mohave Desert in a 30 mile an hour crosswind with the temperature hovering around 100 degrees changes you.  But it sure makes you appreciate an over-priced, air-conditioned balcony room at the Colorado Belle. 

But, now I am alone. And, I do not care. I head off across the desert alone. All I care is that I am finally out of El Lay. And, like Byron in the desert, for an hour or two, “I might forget the human race . . ."  quote from Donald Charles Davis

Update June 2019 - we made our Colorado Belle reservations for next year.  The balcony room rates are around $50 a night less.  Still too expensive, but oh well . . . some things you're just willing to overpay. 


​No biker deserves to be bored . . . 

Not wanting to risk a slow ride with lots of lane splitting on the Four Oh Five during Friday morning rush hour, we spent Thursday night in Del Mar at an overpriced hotel.  At least we were close to the Fish Market and had some amazing clam chowder for dinner. 

​The run started Friday @ 12 noon at San Diego Harley Davidson, the one that now occupies the original Price Club building on Morena Blvd.  I lived a couple of miles from there umpteen years ago. 

​Deja vu all over again. 

​Riding the 27 miles on Interstate 5 to the Mexican border resembled something from the movie It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World. Getting into Mexico isn't usually a problem, unless you're on a motorcycle.  Rows of what looks like upside down mixing bowls stand between you and Tijuana.  A bike close to us went down, then another one.  We were very careful. Once across, we got behind about 10 bikes and figured they would get us to where we needed to go.    They did.                                                  Safely across the border in TJ

Opened to the public in 1924, the Rosarito Beach Hotel was a favorite haunt of Hollywood stars such as Marilyn Monroe, Lana Turner, and Kim Novak. A sign above the lobby entrance states:  "Through This Door Pass The Most Beautiful Women In The World."   Still holds true today. 

​While waiting in a very slow line to check in, hotel employees brought out trash cans full of beer.  The guy behind me looked thirsty too.  Turns out we knew each other - sort of. He and his wife live close by in Simi Valley.  And he and my wife have the same bike - crushed ice pearl Street Glides.  Simi Valley Harley Davidson only sold two bikes in that color last year. 

​So there we were in Rosarito marveling at the coincidence.  He, his wife, me and my wife got to hang together all weekend - plus another couple they are good friends with. 

​I love being lucky.

Saturday - we almost missed the Toy Run. 

​My wife forgot her gloves, so I had to fetch them back up in our room.   The elevators at the Rosarito Beach Hotel are agonizingly slow.  Our apologies to the two drivers whose mirrors we hit trying to get through traffic to where we needed to be.  Luckily we barely made it and were able to cut in the line of bikes already under way on Blvd Benito Juarez.  Whew . . . 

It was quite a noisy spectacle inching our way through town.  Lots of folks taking pictures and videos of the bikes.  By the way, fishtail pipes are really fucking loud.  My ears are still ringing. 

Hundreds of children and their families jammed the parking lot at the Toy Run site.  Several MC's formed what looked like a Bucket Brigade and passed down box after box of soccer balls and boogie boards.  

Dozens of bicycles that had been pre-assembled adorned the stage in neat rows. 

​Anxious faces looked on. 

​Then one by one, the children were called up to claim their treasures.  

​For more information about the annual Rosarito Toy Run, go to https://www.rd4c.net/ and https://www.facebook.com/RD4C.net/
​

After the Toy Run, our new friends invited us to join them for a late lunch in Puerto Nuevo.  Turns out, Puerto Nuevo is the "Lobster Capital" of Baja and a gorgeous 20 minute ride south.  Guzzling pitchers of margaritas and scarfing down lobster with friends all while overlooking the Pacific Ocean is something I want to do again, and again.  Street vendors offering free shots of "homemade" tequila completed a perfect afternoon.  Although I suspect their motive$  were not entirely gratuitou$.             12 lobster tails plus shrimp, fish, scallops and calamari

Papas & Beer on a Saturday night looks sort of like a scaled down version of Times Square on New Year's Eve.  A couple of blocks from our hotel, Papas & Beer is known for being the Spring Break Capital of the West Coast.  Hundreds of wasted 18 year olds must be a sight to behold. 

​A big thanks to Charros MC for letting us hang in their area at Papas & Beer.  After we parked our six butts on some unoccupied stools, we realized our mistake.  Finally one of their members came over and asked where we were from.  When I responded "Los Angeles" and then added we had attended the Toy Run earlier that day, the ice was broken.  Thank you Pyro and Charros MC for the hospitality. 

When the promised "escort to the border" didn't show up at Papas & Beer on Sunday morning, the six of us headed north on our own (luckily, our friends had done this before). We learned the secrets and shortcuts needed to get back into the US on a motorcycle on a Sunday in around 30 minutes. 

Not wanting the fun to end, we all stopped for lunch at the always crowded Old Town section of San Diego. 

​We found parking for our bikes right in front of a Mexican restaurant.  I love irony.   

​And ​I love being lucky . . . 

Ozzie, Marlen; Jose, Patty - we had a blast!


​No biker deserves to be bored . . . 

​Photo taken from the Colorado Belle hotel - Full Moon Fever

Looking east from Laughlin, Nevada across the Colorado River to Bullhead City, Arizona.  

The t-shirts we bought at the Laughlin River Run a couple of weeks ago have "36th" stamped on them.  I guess that means the River Run started in 1982.  Back then Ronald Reagan was still in his first term as President, the Cold War was very hot, and the infamous "River Run Riot" was 20 years off in the future.  

Laughlin is about 100  miles south of Las Vegas and could easily be labeled "Vegas Lite."  There is a Strip that has around eight major hotels, all with casinos.  Large banners advertise upcoming shows and concerts featuring artists such as Pit Bull, Willie Nelson and George Thorogood.  For homesick hungry southern Californians, there is an In-N-Out Burger right across the street from the Colorado Belle that is open until 1:00 am. 

A sea of mostly Harley Davidson motorcycles along with hundreds of vendors take over the parking lots along the Strip during "Bike Week."  The vendors are very cool.  My wife upgraded her amplifier and speakers on her Street Glide; now she can actually hear music at 80 mph on the freeway. Thanks to J&M Motorcycle Audio.  Then after having a few too many vodka and cranberry juice cocktails, she went over to the LED lights vendor, Glowride Custom LED's (yes, she walked over), and bought an LED light system.  Given her condition, they were nice enough to ride her bike over to their space.

Not to be left behind in the bike upgrades department, I had the Vance & Hines folks install headers on my Fat Boy.  Gone are my slip ons and headers with catalytic converters. Most after-market pipes and FuelPaks cannot be legally sold in or shipped to California.  And I got a great deal.  Two good reasons to buy shit in Nevada.  I read that River Run amounts to 10% of the Laughlin economy. No wonder everyone is so nice.  

One of the big attractions of the Laughlin River Run is the nearby "old Route 66."  This refers to the remnants of the Mother Road that still exist and can be ridden safely.  The Route 66 town of Oatman is a short 45 minute ride from Laughlin.  Today, Oatman is part ghost town, part tourist attraction and part wild burro rescue.  Oatman was a gold mining town until 1941 when the mine was ordered shuttered by the US government.  The burros are descendants of the pack animals used by the miners and are a big part of the charm and history of Oatman.  Most of the shops have bags of "Burro Food" that cost $1.00.  But the day we were there, the burros didn't seem very hungry for the dried food cubes.  Of course it could have something to do with the fact there were around 10,000 people in Oatman that day, all of whom had a bag of burro food.  But then a shopkeeper told us they actually like carrots.  She also mentioned carrots give the burros the runs, so tourists are discouraged from the practice.  Maybe next year I will smuggle some in. 

​Our take aways from Laughlin are the constant rumble of bikes on South Casino Drive, the outdoor bars with endless amounts of alcohol available while you listen to tribute bands doing Guns 'N Roses, Alice In Chains and AC/DC songs (really good bands, by the way), midnight runs to the hotel gift shop for Advil and ice cream, hot engines idling at traffic lights in Bullhead City with the temperature hovering around 105 degrees and loving every minute of it (well, almost loving it), resisting the urge to buy one more "River Run" t-shirt, and being around some very cool people. 
​
I overheard an "old timer" commenting to his friend that Laughlin "isn't what it used to be."  I'm sure it's not.  For one thing - since the River Run Riot, the major hotels have a strict "no colors" policy.  River Run has been called an over-policed swap meet. I can attest that Las Vegas cops are everywhere (we talked to one of them for several minutes; he was very nice too.)  Bike Week in Laughlin usually averages around 25 arrests and one stolen motorcycle.  My neighborhood probably fares worse over any given 4 days. 

But the gatherings give us permission to be loud and crazy, and as Donald Charles Davis put it: "to chase the American dream of being an outlaw. It seems that everyone here is at one with the Hells Angels, Mongols and Vagos and all these civilians differ from patch holders only in the extent of their commitment to this alienated identity. They did not join. So their lives did not spin off in radical new directions. So they may not quite belong.  But they are here . . . "  

Well said Rebel. 

No biker deserves to be bored . . . 

The first R rated movie I ever saw was Easy Rider. This took place at a drive-in theater in Florida with my girlfriend - the distinct pungency of pot filled the night air. Easy Rider was life changing for me, although the changes didn't come for quite some time.  A paperback book/screenplay of the movie was published in 1969, the same year the film was released.  

​In the "Introduction To Easy Rider" at the beginning of book, Frederic Tuten says - "In Easy Rider the bikes are incidental, they might as well be horses . . . "  

That might be true.  But to me, those bikes were the coolest thing I had ever seen.  I of course went right out and bought the paperback book/screenplay, probably at the same bookstore where I had found Hunter Thompson's "Hells Angels, A Strange and Terrible Saga" a few years earlier. I showed it to my best friend on the night of our Senior Prom (I don't think our dates appreciated the distraction).  

​I read him the part towards the end where George and Billy are arguing about freedom. George tells Billy - "I mean, it's real hard to be free when you are bought and sold in the marketplace.  'Course don't ever tell anybody that they're not free, cause then they're gonna get real busy killin' and maimin' to prove to you that they are.  Oh, yeah - they're gonna talk to you about individual freedom.  But they see a free individual, it's gonna scare 'em."  When Billy responds that it doesn't make them "runnin' scared."   George replies - "No, it makes 'em dangerous . . . "

The Pine Breeze Inn was/is on old Route 66 in Bellemont, Arizona just outside of Flagstaff. This short stretch of Route 66 is easily accessible by bike and car, but the road ends just a few feet from the old Inn. This exact location is featured at the beginning of Easy Rider.  It's Wyatt's and Billy's first night on the road, so they pull in on their choppers to get a room for the night.  The proprietor comes to the door, takes one look, slams the door and turns on the neon "No Vacancy" sign.  Billy flips him off as they ride off into the night.  Then like real bikers, they end up camping and singing around the campfire - "I'm goin' down to Mardi Gras; I'm gonna get me a Mardi Gras queen . . . "

I couldn't tell if the original building is still in use, although I could see some scattered furnishings through the window.  And a cool Easy Rider movie poster is taped to the inside glass of the front door.  There's a small RV park behind the building, presumably where the cabins used to be that made up the Inn.  Almost 50 years later, it was really cool to ride to the Pine Breeze Inn using the route from LA that Wyatt and Billy would have taken.  And to reflect on the impact that film eventually had on my life.

You can barely make out the words "Pine Breeze Inn" on this side of the building.

​No biker deserves to be bored . . . 

When I learned to ride six years ago, the instructor in my Rider's Edge class asked us to write down 5 or 6 goals we wanted to achieve after the class. These could be short term or long term goals.  The last goal I wrote down was "Ride Route 66."  Or at least what's left of it.  I finally achieved that goal a couple of weeks ago with my wife and 10 other bikes from our HOG chapter (Simi Valley, CA).  The early sixties TV show by the same name was my first awareness of the "Mother Road." And also my introduction to Corvettes.  I've never owned a Corvette, but I can now say I've ridden a good portion of Arizona Route 66 on a Harley Davidson motorcycle.  

In his book "Ghost Towns Of Route 66," Jim Hinckley says it this way:  "The old highway is more than a 2,291 mile (according to a 1936 map) ribbon of asphalt line with dusty remnants, ghostly vestiges, and polished gems manifesting more than eighty years of American societal evolution.  To drive Route 66 is to follow the path of a new nation on its journey of westward expansion."  As I rode along the mostly deserted highway, I thought about all the people who got in their cars in Chicago and made their way to Santa Monica.  Especially the families taking the obligatory summer "road trip," which probably took around three weeks (both ways including a week at Disneyland).  The peak of such unhurried vacations would have been the late 1940's and most of the 1950's.  Post-war prosperity had put roomy station wagons in garages and money in people's pockets.  What better way to put both to good use than to pile the family in the Ford Country Squire and head West.  

But as I rode along, I also thought about how different travel was back then.  Much of Route 66 in Texas, New Mexico, Arizona and California goes through a very desolate and hot part of our country.  Cars were not air conditioned.  Cell phones were still 40 years away.  Credit cards were nonexistent. The 2,300 mile journey took a week of driving in sweltering air with cranky kids in the back seat asking "are we there yet?"  I'm not sure how those people did it.    

The construction of Interstate 40 bypassed most of the towns along Route 66 that depended on these midwestern folks to buy gasoline and souvenirs. One of those towns that seems to have survived is Williams, Arizona.

​If you want to know what Route 66 was like in 1955, go to Williams.  It was the last town to be bypassed by I-40 (construction of I-40 began in 1957 was completed at Williams in 1984).  Besides lots of Route 66 nostalgia around, Williams prides itself on being the gateway to the Grand Canyon. The Grand Canyon railway takes visitors there every morning.  Our group spent the night at a very cool motel called The Lodge On Route 66.  The property was a condemned vintage motor court when the current owner bought and renovated it. Guests can still park in front of their rooms in the classic motor-court tradition (which is exactly what we did!). There was even a vintage car show in town for the weekend which added an extra touch of nostalgia, not that Williams needs it.

One more thing . . . a must stop along this stretch of Route 66 is the Hackberry General Store in Kingman. This little spot may epitomize the Route 66 culture more than any other.  Or at least it has one of best selections of cheesy double six souvenirs that we ran across.  If you're on a bike, be careful. The parking lot is all gravel and very slippery. 




Perhaps telling you about the coolest stop we made on Route 66 should be reserved for its very own post.  Here's a hint . . . "Hey, you got a room?"  Proprietor turns and exits back into office.  ​"Hey, man!  you gotta room?"  Another neon light goes on over the first "Vacancy" sign - it reads:  "NO" Wyatt exits as he backs the cycle.  Billy gives "the finger."

No biker deserves to be bored . . . 
​

​Mulholland Drive was officially opened in 1924, built by various real estate developers of the Hollywood Hills.  It was named for William Mulholland, the person most responsible for transporting much needed water to a growing city via the Los Angeles Aqueduct. The idea behind the road was to traverse the top of the Santa Monica mountains from east (at the Cahuenga Pass) to west (at the Sepulveda pass).  During the 1950's and 1960's, the famous road became even more famous as kids in cars discovered various "lookout points" along the route where they could stop, take in at the breathtaking city lights, and "make out."  Mulholland Drive became known as a veritable Lover's Lane.  Then in 2001, David Lynch's movie by the same name was released; the late movie critic Roger Ebert's review called it a "a surrealist dreamscape in the form of a Hollywood film noir, and the less sense it makes, the more we can't stop watching it.

West of the Sepulveda Pass, Mulholland Drive becomes an unpaved road not open to motor vehicles.  It opens again just east of Toganga Canyon Boulevard, then splits into Mulholland Drive and Mulholland Highway.  Mulholland Drive terminates at the 101 Freeway in Woodland Hills (close to our house). Much more well known for its breathtaking vistas, sweeping turns and white-knuckle twisties, Mulholland Highway is the much preferred route of bikers and fast cars over Mulholland Drive.  There you will find The Rock Store, originally a stage coach stop and a favorite hangout of Steve McQueen.  You will also find "The Snake" - three miles of hell that will test the mettle of any rider.  

Yesterday, our group of bikes set out to ride Mulholland Drive as far as we could go.  Then slab it to the Sagebrush Cantina in Calabasas for lunch before setting off to ride Mulholland Highway all the way to to its  terminus at Pacific Coast Highway.  But due to the recent "rainmageddon" in southern California, parts of Mulholland Highway were strewn with rocks and dirt - making it too dangerous in the lower sections of the road.  So right after surviving The Snake, we made a left on to Kanan Dune and then took Latigo Canyon down to PCH.  Latigo is always a fun roller-coaster ride. 

I had driven Mulholland Drive in a car a few times, but never ridden it on a bike.  It's a very fun road, although a little chewed up in spots and crowded with cars at the Runyon Canyon trail head.  But it has some nice turns and spectacular views.  Here is a lookout point we stopped at early on in the ride.  This view is looking northeast towards Universal City (yes, that's the new Harry Potter castle in the middle-right of the picture) with beautiful downtown Burbank in the distance. 

July 3, 2016 will mark the 25th anniversary of the release of Terminator 2: Judgment Day.   Directed by James Cameron (who might be better known for directing Titanic), the film was iconic for several reasons.  First off, if Arnold Schwarzenegger wasn’t already a household name, he certainly became one in July of 1991. Technically, the film broke new ground with the most advanced use of computer generated imagery (CGI) to date including the first partially computer generated main character.  It was the most expensive film ever made up to that point in time and became the highest grossing film of 1991 and Schwarzenegger’s career.  Finally, the expression “Hasta la vista, baby” was instantly inserted into millions of peoples’ vocabulary. 

And perhaps unintentionally, an American company named Harley Davidson and an American singer/songwriter named George Thorogood were both forever changed.  

​Before a show in Phoenix, Arizona, George told me Bad To The Bone was the result of simply trying to come up with a cool guitar lick in the same style as Keith Richard’s Satisfaction or J.J. Cale’s Cocaine.  When he finally landed on the opening riff to Bad To The Bone, he knew he had something big.  But it wasn’t until ten years later that he would learn exactly how big it was. 

In 1969 the Harley Davidson Motor Company was acquired by the American Machine & Foundry Company (AMF), the same company that makes bowling balls and tennis rackets.  Quality control immediately suffered. Things became so bad that the Motor Company had to set up “hospitals,” way stations where bikes that had come off the assembly line incomplete were patched up and shipped off to dealers.  

Harley Davidson also tried to distance itself from the biker world and especially the outlaw biker world.  Harley never really acknowledged its dark side. The company, based in Milwaukee, was steeped in Midwestern values. In the 1970’s and 80’s, the Motor Company was more intent on competing with Honda, Yamaha, and Suzuki than they were in looking at themselves in the mirror and admitting what the Harley Davidson brand actually stood for - freedom, rebellion and the outlaw lifestyle.  

A leveraged buyout by the founder’s grandson Willie G Davidson and a group of Harley executives got rid of AMF but not the company’s ongoing problems. Strapped with debt, the Motor Company came close to forced bankruptcy in 1986.  But Harley survived and to celebrate its renaissance, the company on June 18, 1988, threw itself a huge eighty-fifth birthday party in Milwaukee, complete with a concert by the Charlie Daniels Band.  

And at the same time, Harley stylists Willie G Davidson and Louie Netz were busy designing perhaps the most iconic and successful motorcycle Harley Davidson ever produced - the Fat Boy.   By 1990, the Fat Boy was in dealers' showrooms.  The Motor Company's turnaround was complete. 

“I need your clothes, your boots, and your motorcycle . . . “ is Arnold Schwarzenegger’s first line of Terminator 2 - the famous opening “bar scene.”  Arnold plays one of two different Terminators sent back in time to do battle over whether Sarah and John Connor survive into the future.  But first, Arnold needs threads and wheels - quickly. 

After laying waste to several bikers in the bar, a leather jacket clad Arnold steps outside looking for the bike he’s about to steal.  As Arnold’s Terminator takes two steps down to where the bikes are parked, George’s opening guitar riff from Bad To The Bone wailed through theater speakers all across the world.  

​A bearded man (the bartender) wearing a denim vest and holding a sawed-off shotgun appears, blasts off a couple of shells, and tries to reason with Arnold - “can’t let you take the man’s wheels son. Now get off before I put you down . . . ”  Upon which Arnold gets off the bike, grabs the shotgun, takes the man’s Ray Bans out of his pocket and cooly puts them on.  

The song continues as Arnold crams the shotgun into a saddle bag, kick starts a Harley Davidson Fat Boy, and roars off into the night.   The Terminator’s transformation to badass biker is complete.  

If the folks watching Terminator 2 didn’t already know about Big-Twin-Harleys and a song called Bad To The Bone, they certainly knew about both when they walked out of the theater.  To this day, never was a song and a movie scene so perfectly matched.

Last weekend, I rode home on a new Fat Boy Lo.  After the Sportster, I had a Road King touring bike for a year-and-a-half.  My wife and I thought we wanted to hit the open highways and byways of America with her on the back.  But then she ended up getting her own bike (a Softail Slim that she adores more than life itself).  The touring thing went by the wayside.  

I broke a thousand hearts
Before I met you
I'll break a thousand more, baby
Before I am through
I wanna be yours pretty baby
Yours and yours alone
I'm here to tell ya honey
That I'm bad to the bone
Bad to the bone
B-B-B-Bad
​Bad to the bone. . .     
Lyrics by George Thorogood; copyright Del Sound Music /BMI

No biker deserves to be bored . . .

The Santa Monica Mountains are a part of the only east-west belt of mountains in North America. Comprised of rocks nearly 200 million years old, the mountains were formed in many series of ruptures between the Pacific Plate and the North American Plate. If you live where I do in the western end of the San Fernando Valley, the Santa Monica Mountains might be viewed as a hindrance in quickly getting from the Valley to Malibu and the beaches along Pacific Coast Highway.  

​But if you ride, these mountains provide some of the most challenging, fun but also dangerous roads to be found anywhere.  

Deals Gap, North Carolina is the official address of the highly publicized "Tail Of The Dragon," otherwise known as US Highway 129.  The Tail of the Dragon website boasts "with 318 curves in 11 miles, is America’s number one motorcycle and sports car road" (although most of the 11 miles is actually in eastern Tennessee).   Just north of the Tail is the malevolent sounding "Devil's Triangle."  The DT website states "the tight twisties are as good as the Tail of the Dragon but there are even more dangers here; deep rock strewn gullies just off the pavement, ragged steel guard rails, steep drop offs and rock cliffs leave no room for error."  Hmmmm - sounds a lot like the road Elisa and I rode yesterday.  

 I was born and raised in middle Tennessee.  So I do have a certain fondness for the Volunteer State.  While growing up, my family made several trips to the Great Smoky Mountains, mainly a tourist trap called Gatlinburg.  We happened to be motel people, not camping people.  I became intimately familiar with all of the souvenir shops within walking distance of our motel.  So while I've been to eastern Tennessee many times, it was long before I learned how to ride.  And it was also long before the Tail Of The Dragon became a "motorcycle resort" (around the early 1990's).  

Follow the leader is a children's game. First a leader or "head of the line" is chosen, then the children all line up behind the leader. The leader then moves around and all the children have to mimic the leader's actions. Any players who fail to follow or do what the leader does are out of the game.  Quote from the Follow The Leader (Game) page in Wikipedia.  

Riding in a group reminds me of playing Follow The Leader when I was a kid.  It can be a lot of fun - but if you make a mistake or mess up, you're out of the game. You put your safety and life at risk riding in a group, as well as the other riders around you.  I crashed my bike during my first ever group ride.  I fractured my left arm just below my shoulder.  I was lucky no one else was hurt.  I made a beginner mistake.  I was in over my head and the stress of the ride contributed to my making the mistake. 

I had been riding only two months when I signed up for what was described as a beginner's ride posted on the website of a popular local riding group I had recently joined.  Here is the verbatim text that was used:  This will be a ride for beginners to get their feet wet, dust off the rust and enjoy a ride through some very scenic canyons with several changes of elevation in Santa Clarita/Acton. The ride will be at an easy pace to appreciate all of the different landscapes and beautiful views.  The ride sounded doable and the destination (a popular biker food and drink establishment) seemed like a reasonable distance for a beginner's ride.  But wait - the ride description failed to mention the route would go 40 miles past the destination and then double back in time for lunch.  So it turned out to be a much longer ride than I expected. 

I suppose the words "scenic canyons" should have been a big red flag.  But I naively assumed a "ride for beginners" meant exactly that.   

One of the most common problems that occurs during group rides is what's called the "rubber-band effect" which causes large gaps to form in the pack.  There are a few reasons for this:  different skill levels of the riders; group leaders in the front speeding up suddenly; bikes in the rear having to stop for a red light; and too many bikes in the pack to begin with.  This is dangerous for two reasons:  (1) it allows cars to get in between the bikes and, (2) bikes have to speed to catch up once there is a gap between bikes.  For example if the pack up ahead is going 50 mph, the bikes that fall behind will have to go 70 mph in order to catch up.  

The rubber band effect was happening on the ride when I had my accident.  The constant falling behind and speeding to catch up caused a lot of stress resulting in my losing concentration.  Not to mention the ride went through some very technical canyons that should not have been included in a beginner ride.  This caused more stress.  When I questioned the ride organizers later about this, all they had to say was the pace of the ride made it a beginner ride, not the route.  But the excessive speed required at times to "catch up" totally negated any leisurely pace at other times.  And technical canyon roads are never, by any stretch of the imagination, good for beginners in a group ride.  

Here is some advice from the Rock Store website regarding riding "The Snake," a very technical stretch of Mulholland Highway between Kanan Dume and Las Virgenes:

If you cannot control your bike within the confines of a single lane then you must slow down. End of story, debate over. If you need further explanation, ride her once and you will understand. This is a tight, highly technical piece of road with steep drop offs, few guard rails and little room for error. Every week there are one or two serious accidents on The Snake, most which are caused by bikes and other vehicles crossing the double yellow line or unsafe speeds.

So let me repeat myself - technical canyon roads are never good for beginners in a group ride, or any other time if the rider isn't up to it.  Start out on easier roads and build up confidence gradually.  Any road where the second word in the name of the road is "Canyon" should not be part of a beginner group ride - ever.

I've participated in numerous group rides since healing from the accident - a few were enjoyable, but most were not.  My riding skills have improved tremendously since that first group ride, and I consider myself to be a good rider today.  But I continue to observe the same problem with large groups being unable to stay together.  

If you're considering going on a group ride, here is my advice: stay away from riding in a large pack of bikes - any one group should not have more than 10 bikes; make sure you know the ride route before committing to participate and make sure you have the skill and experience to complete the route with minimal stress; make sure your group has an experienced road captain/leader - don't be shy about asking him or her a few safety questions before the ride; make sure you're comfortable riding close to other bikes; and if the ride is too fast, too technical, or if the riders around you are careless, bail out of the ride immediately (I've had to do this more than once).  

Group rides can be a blast with the right people, but they can also very dangerous.  Choose your group carefully and pick a ride that you can comfortably handle.  Your life will depend on it. 

Post-Script to the above post:  today is November 11, 2017.  It was six years ago today  that I crashed my bike on Spunky Canyon Road while on an advertised "beginners' ride." Luckliy I wasn't seriously injured and I'm still riding today.  But I feel the need to say more about this topic.

This week I saw a ride scheduled for tomorrow on the same riding group's website. The ride is described as an "epic beginner's ride."  The ride is taking Mulholland Highway to the Rock Store and then down to PCH and over to Neptune's Net.  

Included in the route description is the following:  "it is a true beginners ride that will have no Freeways and some twisties including the world famous Snake."  As the risk of repetition, here's what I posted about The Snake in my original post above:  This is a tight, highly technical piece of road with steep drop offs, few guard rails and little room for error. Every week there are one or two serious accidents on The Snake, most which are caused by bikes and other vehicles crossing the double yellow line or unsafe speeds.  Again, that description is from the Rock Store's website.  That doesn't sound like something to be included in a beginner's ride.  

If you've never ridden The Snake, here's my advice:  go on a weekday when there aren't any crotch rockets zipping around.  Take it nice and slow; leave plenty of room as you enter and exit the turns.  Go top to bottom, then turn around and go bottom to top.  Do this round trip a few times.  Without the pressure to keep up in a group, you will build a lot of confidence.  And you will be in a much safer situation. 

It's okay to be a beginner in a canyon.  Just know what you're getting into if you're going on a group ride that includes one like The Snake. 

No biker deserves to be bored . . .